Wednesday, February 28, 2018

amplop berisi pikiran dan perasaan februari.


hari yang kemarin, aku terbaca ramalan ahli kaji cuaca. katanya akan ada hujan di sana hari ini. apakah perkiraan mereka benar? ataukah langit mahu bercanda dengan mereka hari ini? oh ya, di sini tadi hujan. tapi hujannya sekejap-sekejap. sekitar lima minit hujan, lalu segera selesai. dan tidak lama, tiba-tiba turun lagi untuk lima minit, kemudian hujannya terus hilang. ah, mungkin langit sedang kebosanan hari ini.

*lapar. makan jap.
**lapar lagi. makan jap.
***haus. minum jap.

Saturday, February 17, 2018


"did you see it?" 
"dude, we feel the wind, not see it." 
"okay. did you feel it?" 
"well, yeah.. why though?"
"we often asked the wrong question, ain't we?" 
"hmm, i guess so.. then, we confused ourselves in the process of getting the answers."

"okay, let say you're a doctor.." 
"no, i'm not." 
"that's it. i gave up." 
"haha. okay okay.. so, what if i'm a doctor?' 
"when a patient come to see you,  and this is the first time you meet him or her, what will you expect from him or her?" 
"hmm.. what? i don't know.. never be a doctor before.." 
"urghh.. i know this is going nowhere.."
"you be the doctor then." 
"ah, never mind who is the doctor. but i think, the basic are, the doctor need to know what are the patient's diseases or symptoms as the mukaddimah." 
"so, what if a patient came to a doctor, then he or she skip that stage and directly ask for treatments or medicines."
"both the patient and the doctor will be very confused. nothing will be cured."

"now, here is the thing.. did we ever talk to God about our sickness? how did the sessions going? did we sincerely explained everything we felt and going through? did we sincerely confessed to Him that we're emotionally and spiritually ill, if not physically sick?" 
"okay i've got your point. to simplify, did we fully put our trust into Him?"
"yup. unlike the doctor, this stage of confessing before Him, the purpose is never to let Him know what our illness are, He indeed know everything, even if we never said them. more than that, this is already part of our curing. let all the toxic thoughts inside our mind, heart and soul to come out. if not, they will be more and more poisonous.
"this is all about getting closer to As-Shafee; The Healer along the treatment process, because only He know what's best for us to be healed."

"just like the wind talked to us through its cooling breeze on a hot sunny noon. even if we can't see it, we still feel the coolness."
"the God promised us too.." 
"in surah number two and ayah number one eight six." 
"and if my servants ask you(the prophet saw) about Me, then I am indeed near."

Wednesday, February 07, 2018

just what you're worth,

lights will guide you home.